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Showing posts with label adults. Show all posts
Showing posts with label adults. Show all posts

5 Relationship Mistakes That Influence Financial Decisions

Sunday, June 7, 2009

How we spend money is often affected by our moods and our moods are often affected by people. Often times, we generate our actions based on how we feel at the moment and forget that it may have long term repercussions.



Mistake #1: Your best friend just put a down on a brand new Lexus after he received a promotion. You've got money in the bank saved up and you know you can afford a better car than what he just bought. Now, you're surfing the internet for the best dealership markdowns and you want to show off that you're doing just as well as he is.

The real deal: Not only will your friend see that you've taken the time to buy a new car after him but he might just take your friendship to a different perspective that you look at him as competitor. He'll also see that you feel threatened by his actions and have insecurities about yourself of being unable to go with the flow of his lavish lifestyle. Save your money instead and save your friendship. If it wasn't your intention in the first place to upgrade your vehicle, then pause that thought until you're lucid about what you want and are positive that you know you need a new car. You never know, especially with the market fluctuating, he may admire you later on when you get an even newer model and make of a vehicle when you know for certain you'll be satisfied with your purchase and your own self.


Mistake #2: Your significant other dumps you. The next week at the classy restaurant three cities from you, you just happen to spot them with a new date. All of the sudden, you want to step up your appearance and drastically change what you look like to make the envious.

The real deal: You're ready to hit up the mall and feel that if you buy that one outfit or change your hair that you'll definitely get them to notice you again and make them feel sorry for ever letting you go. At the end of the day, you realize that you've blown a week's paycheck on the seven bags of clothes, accessories, shoes, and whatever else is on those receipts when you get home. If you're a female, you can add another $150.00 for getting your nails, hair, pedicure, and facial done. They see you again and notices how ravishing you look a couple weeks later yet now, they're introducing you to their fiancé. It turns out they were just taking a break, they dated you, and they went back to them. On top of that, the outfits you bought just went on sale and now you've missed the opportunity to save $50.00. Then, you might just be secretive and call them or text to ask what went wrong in your last relationship. Their answer just happens to be your personality and in the end it had nothing to do with how attractive you were.


Mistake #3: Everyone is going to Europe this summer and you've always wanted to go. They'll think you're broke if you don't go - at least that's what you believe. You're looking at the bank account and only $2,000 is sitting there. You know that if you bought a ticket and went on your way, you can survive on it.

The real deal: Tickets are not cheap, especially to Europe. Then, you'll have to estimate travel costs outside of the airport in order to get around. So now you've purchased the ticket, went on your way to Europe, paid for a hotel and realized that you're down to your last cent. You told your friend the situation and now you just look plain foolish for ever going because it was never in your budget. Now, not only do you look broke but look outstandingly dumb for spending your last dime and everyone has to pitch in for you to get back home eventually yet that trip date isn't until a week from now. Your meal ticket is your friend's budget. That's certainly inconvenient and a burden to other people. Make sure that you have enough money to go on vacation even if you think you seriously deserve one, it's the worst thing to be trying to relax and stress out about something else instead. Tip: Buy tickets at least eleven months in advance to a location you've really wanted to go for sometime and only when you have reserved money to splurge on it. Then, create a savings account where you put something in every time you get a paycheck or extra money. In about eleven months, you should be smiling to cultural music and buying souvenirs for people back home, taking pictures along exotic coastlines, or mailing back a pictures of foreign landmarks. Use your best judgement.


Mistake#4: You've got mutual friends with your partner and it just so happens an anniversary came up and they bought their significant other an extravagant gift. You're ecstatic waiting for a special occassion to happen because you want something similar.

The real deal: The last thing on their mind is to get you an extravagant gift. To be completely honest, you shouldn't be expecting any type of gift unless they've mentioned it because it's one thing to be given a gift, it's another to expect a grand gesture. Just because your friend or sibling received a $1,000 gift card or a Rolex doesn't mean you should expect the same for your mate. Even if you've bought your partner a car, a ring, and all the other fancies - it doesn't mean that they're required to give the extravance you've been able to afford. First of all, an occassion should be meaningful and whatever is given to you is a sign of acknowledgement that they care about you. Second, even a card should be enough to signify the importance of that date. Avoid phrases such as, "You know what you can get me for ..." or "For my birthday, I want you to get me a ..." Phrases such as these turn people off and feel obligated to get you something along these lines even if they can't afford it. Avoid these situations and be grateful for someone who loves you enough to let you know somehow. Besides, money can't buy love.


Mistake#5: It's been tough lately to find a job and you've been searching all day. The bills are due and you're panicking. You've got an idea to call some friends out for a loan. That should bail you out for a while.

The real deal: Don't borrow money from friends because not all friendships are secure. There's a phrase that goes borrow from a friend and collect from an enemy which is many times true. Some friends like to gossip or accuse you of taking advantage of them. Some friends want their money back immediately and as already mentioned, you're struggling to find a job so two months down the line, you're still financially hurting and now you owe them money too. My suggestion is to go to your city's human services office of welfare for help. If you have shut off notices, you may be entitled to immediate cash aid and utility services. If you need food, they provide services where they can fund your needs as well as enroll you in a government health care program. This includes any dependents if you have any such as a spouse or children. They'll help you in every way possible to get by. Also, call your creditors and let them know the situation so they can extend your due dates or waive/minimize payments. These people are more than willing to work with you.

The Cheaply Chic Young Adult



Being twenty-two and still self seeking, I sat down one day and decided to reflect upon what has got to be the worst ways to blow money on a single outing with friends or colleagues. I thought to myself I'm still young and I want to have fun. But how far can having fun get until it is expensive and financially abusive? Here are a few scenarios that young adults can enjoy yet be able to live on a small budget without crying about living independently.


The Movie Buff

Let's see, a night at the movies shouldn't be too expensive right? The ticket will cost about $10.00, then we'll grab some popcorn at about $5.00. Of course, we'll need some gas to get there so let's say the neighborhood theater is about a few miles away from home so $2.00 would be the approximate cost of a round trip. Oh wait, the popcorn is making me thirsty mid movie and I need to satisfy my thirst and what is this? $3.00 for a large carbonated beverage?! Really? Ok, well I guess I'll have to splurge this time since I'm in need of a drink and of course, purchasing one outside of the theater and bringing it back in would be out of the question. Tonight, I spent about $20.00 on a movie alone for myself. Darn.

What alternative could I have possibly had?

Redbox movies are rented for only $1.00 plus tax a night. Popcorn at a grocery store for a small pack is around $2.00 (or hit up your local Target for a bag of fresh popcorn for a $1.00.) Now, let's grab a soda at the store while we're in line at the register and count change adding up to another $1.00 + tax. I'm sure these trips can be done at around the same distance as the theatre so $2.00 goes into my gas tank again. What? A movie night had only cost me $5.00 at the most?


The Risk Taker


Everyone's going to the new casino out of town and they've invited you to come along. You've decided to go and they've even offered you to ride with them. Sure, why not? Five hours later, you find yourself sitting down and feeling like a complete idiot calculating how much is due of your bills and realizing you're just not going to make it this month. You're now even burying your hands in your pockets looking for change to supposedly win the money back you've lost.

No. My suggestion is that if you know you're going to a place like a casino or even just poker night at friend's house, know your limit. If you know that you're already in the red at the bank, don't even bother and be confident when you say to your friend that you'll pass this time because you have other things to do. If you have money that you can afford to lose, stick to that limit and don't go past it. My recommendation is to take money out before the trip and leave your ATM at home or hidden in the car where you know you can't access it if you've already lost so much money gambling. Also, set a limit that is very doable and not out of desperation or a crazy notion that the million dollar jackpot will be yours eventually if you just keep playing and sacrifice all your money. Stick to a budget such as the amount you would pay for eating out during the week. For example, if it's $50 you usually spend eating out per week, stick to that $50. If you lose it, then all you'll really have to give up is eating out for that week.


Midnight Crisis


Around your early twenties or thirties, we all know that one person or a few people that can't seem to stop living it up by partying too much. If you have someone close to you that frequents nightclubs, you may want to be cautious of being lured to be the sidekick. Drinks at a bar are not cheap. A bottle of Grey Goose at the grocery store will range around $20.00 while at the club, you're bound to pay over a hundred. That's ridiculous. Want a shot of Patron? That'll be $10.00. Admission at the door was $20.00 and you're here still wandering why it was so much when everyone in the venue is doing almost exactly what everyone else does at a high school dance, except for the fact that well - there are strangers everywhere and alcoholic drinks. Then some nights, the drunk friend will need a ride home and you're the smart one who knows you can take care of yourself, however, she lives about thirty minutes way. By the end of the night, you've probably shelled out $60.00 from gas, booze, admission, parking fees, and perhaps a bite to eat after. And you also smell like cheap cologne/perfume and Hennessy from that creepy guy or girl that just wouldn't stop leaving you alone that kept calling you 'Fiesty' all night.

Once in a while, this can be fun but clubbing can be rather expensive and some nights are just not worth the price especially if a fight breaks out and the club evacuates people then you're out what you've spent that night and your fun ends early.

Your best bet is to stick to cozy home get togethers with people you know that can also bring people they know as well as trust. Purchase a few drinks and ingredients to make cocktails or beers, put on some music, grab a few board games or cook dinner - whichever tickles your fancy and voila! Instant party. The best benefit of it all is that if anyone isn't sober enough to go home, they can stay as long as they need to so you don't feel responsible for them driving home. You can even make it a potluck and have everyone bring something so you're not whipping out the cards out of your wallet for everything.



"Too many people spend money they haven't earned, to buy things they don't want, to impress people they don't like." - Will Smith